GK: It's good to be here in Hollywood, especially if you grew up evangelical, it makes it more meaningful. In our home, Hollywood was a name, like some people use Wall Street or the Kremlin, that signified evil, so a Sanctified Brethren boy is watchful walking around this town and what you see is people walking dogs (SFX) and some of them are producers DANNY"! HOW ABOUT LUNCH? "FABULOUS. I'M FREE IN SEPTEMBER" OH. HOW ABOUT OCTOBER?) and some are actors ("He-ey!" "Oh, hiiii!" Bro! (BIG HUG, 3x PATS) WOMEN: ""You look Fabulous" (AIR KISSES) "Great skin tone! Who does your HAIR on weekends?''" and some are grips and stagehands "Yo' Sup?" "Sup.") and they all look terrific, some people carry hair dryers with them (SFX) and hair spray (SFX) and some of them have inflatable delts and pecs under their T-shirts so if you hug them hard (POP, DEFLATION SFX) and the people who don't look terrific, who look exhausted and sweaty, are tourists who are waiting for the bus tour (UNINTELLIGIBLE P.A. VOICE) that'll take you around to look at homes where stars used to live. There are Lamborghinis and Ferraris parked on the street and if you reach out to touch them, there's an alarm (WHOOP! THANK YOU FOR NOT TOUCHING MY CAR). There are palm trees, of course, and swimming pools (SFX DIVE) and Car Pools (SLOSH, Honks) (Hey, move it to the Pool Lane!)...
GK: ...hear people singing underwater (Street Lights, Believin'...), they think it improves breath control. It's a town where at any given moment the unemployment rate is about 65% and that's why everyone is so glad to see each other. (HI!!!! WOW!!!! YOU LOOK GREAT!!!! SO DO YOU!!!!) And that's why everyone is working out (RUNNING, HEAVY BREATHING) and working with weights (SFX) and ellipticals (SFX) and Stairmasters (SFX) and many people hire Rottweilers as trainers (RUNNING, DOG BARKING) ---- a person in Hollywood who does not work out daily is like an atheist in Waco, Texas, you just do not get asked out. And everyone here has a talent and is unique. The security guy here at the Bowl can play a tune on his screening wand ("I'm wild again, beguiled again), your waiter can play "They Call the Wind Maria" on a squeeze bottle of Ketchup, somebody's pet monkey can sing opera ("Queen of the Night" Aria), the gardener can do songs on a chainsaw (SMOKE GETS IN YOUR EYES), we were staying at the Hollywood Sleep More" motel on Sunset where the night manager plays "La Bamba" on a hotel key-card (SFX) and his 14-month old child sings ( "I am the Walrus") and his brother-in-law Mike is talented (gargles Theme from Mondo Cane"
And we actually met a gentleman from Minnesota who's made his home here - he brought his duck call with him and can play "Girl from Ipanema" - that will bring tears to your eyes
GK: So we left to stay at Honeymoon Acres in Malibu and we could hear whales off the coast auditioning ("Some Enchanted Evening") ---- a city of performers ----- I'm from Minnesota, folks, a state of writers, and that's why we don't say much. We are watching. We are gathering material. That's why I'm here. You came here to see the show. I came here to look at you.