There was a young man who loved Schlitz

Which he drank in his room at the Ritz

With pate (very rich)

And olives from which

His servants had cut out the pits.

There was a young man who loved Pabst

He drank it until he collapsed

He gave up beer

For Lent every year

And on Easter morning, relapsed.

There was a young man who loved Millers

More than all other painkillers

He drank secretly

In a dark shadowy

Doorway hidden by pillars.

There was a young man who loved Blatz

He drank it straight out of the vats

Along with a platter

Of vegetable matter

And another of animal fats.

A young man gave up Leinenkugel

For water because he was frugal

But he watched videos

Of girls with no clothes

Drinking beer from a hose, thanks to Google.