My cat she pleaded and my cat she cried

For me to open the door and let her go outside

Then she sat on the lawn underneath a tree

Pretending that she couldn't hear me.

Cat, you better come on home

I said, Cat, you better come on home

There's dogs in the dark waiting to attack

And cat-hawks looking for a late night snack

So Cat, O Cat, you better come on home.

Cat she turned and she tossed her head

"I may or may not come," she said

"I'm a cat who is deeply dissatisfied

I'll let you know when I decide.

Cat, you better come on home

I said, Cat, you better come on home

I'll close this door and lock the bolt

And you'll spend the night in the snow and cold

So Cat, O Cat, you better come on home.

"I'd rather be a cat who meets a terrible fate

Than live with a man who don't appreciate

That a cat is independent and a true high brow

And demands a little high-class chow

I've seen the food that you feed your guests

The turkey and the tuna and the chicken breasts

And do you share it with your cat? No you don't, no way!

Not the poached perch liver pate."

Cat, you better come on home

I said, Cat, you better come on home

I'm not about to stand here and argue with a cat

Now what would the next door neighbor think of that?

So Cat, O Cat, you better come on home.

"Well I never!" she said and arose in a huff

"You've seen the last of your old puff."

She left with a "humph!" and a sardonic laugh

And she left for a year and a half

I felt so bad, full of guilt and shame

I walked around town just calling her name

With a great big plate of Chateaubriand

And some tuna fish in my hand.

Cat, I wish you'd come on home

Cat, I wish you'd come on home

Come on, old Puff, and come home with us

I got a lot of fringe benefits I'd like to discuss

Cat, O Cat, I wish you'd come on home.

I saw her six months later in a cat magazine

The number-one T.V. cat food queen

With a fat contract with a cat food firm

And her hair done up in a perm

I could tell it was Puff though this cat was wrapped

In a white mink coat and her teeth were capped

And she was lying on a beach in the south of Greece

And she'd changed her name to Clarice!

Cat, you'd better come on home

Cat, you'd better come on home

You're a top cat now and you're riding high

But they'll dump you in the river when the well runs dry

Cat, O Cat, you'd better come on home.

Sure enough she came back one day last fall

She was on her last legs, she could barely crawl

With her head and her tail dragging on the ground

For she weighed about sixty-nine pounds

She looked like something the cat dragged in

With her tongue hanging out on her double chin

And great big bags underneath her eyes

And she said "It's me, surprise!"

Cat, I'm glad you came on home

Cat, I'm glad you came on home

No need to explain, my old cat friend

I'm just glad to have you back again

Cat, O Cat, I'm glad you came on home

I picked her up like a big fur sack

She said "Easy jack, I got a salmon on my back.

I got a big salmon habit and that's no lie

I gotta go cold turkey on the tuna fish pie."

If other cats could only know

To hang their hats on the status quo

For the very first thing that a cat can do

Is to make all its dreams come true

Cat, you'd better come on home

Cat, you'd better come on home

If you seek your fortune, nevertheless,

Remember your name and your address

Cat, O Cat, you'd better come on home.

Oh, you can seek your fortune, nevertheless,

Remember your name and your address

Cat, O Cat, you'd better come on home.