TR: Hello, this is Fred Farrell. As November approaches and the nights get longer and longer and the darkness gets deeper, you start to hear sounds in your backyard that you have no idea what they might be. Like this one. (LOW GRUNT) And this one. (GROWL) You turn on the yardlight and you can't see what's back there in the bushes. Could be a wolverine, could be a wombat, you got no idea, but a lot of species are coming into the suburbs that never used to be there, like lemurs and llamas, and spider crabs and speckled cockroaches, and why? Because of government regulation, that's why. There could be a bear out there in the dark (SFX) or a crazed elk (SFX), or an elderly cougar (SFX), or a python (SFX), and what can you do about it? Not a doggone thing. Unless you buy my Fred Farrell Giant Condor call. Carry it on a chain around your neck. The Giant Condor has a wingspread of ten feet, it's the biggest bird in North America, and its sharp cry strikes fear into the heart of mammal and reptile alike. If you're bothered by bill collectors or door-knockers or neighborhood dogs, all you need to do is ---- (CONDOR). Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to Animal Calls. And as a bonus, absolutely free, get six animal calls ---- the cormorant (SFX), camel (SFX), chimpanzee (SFX), chinchilla (SFX), coyote (SFX), and common loon (SFX) ---- when you order the California condor. (SFX) (WINGS)
[JINGLE NEXT PAGE]
SJ (SINGS): If you feel you are in peril,
And over a barrel,
And you fear that there'll
Be a crisis up ahead
And your heart is full of dread,
Reach for Fred----
Fred Farrell. (WOOFS)