In autumn when the days get short,
The mice move into the davenport,
And settle in with great esprit
Deep in the upholstery.
Tiny bug and rodent friends
Come to share your residence.
Bats and squirrels and raccoons too
Quietly move in with you.
Try as you will to fill the cracks,
Set traps, mount poison gas attacks,
In the face of winter weather,
Creatures like to join together,
So don't cry out in shock and fright
If a badger joins you for dinner tonight.
Or a possum. Possums are very polite.
They'd like a salad and creme brulee
And a chamomile tea and they'll go away.
Deer are well-spoken as everyone knows.
No dese or dem for the well-bred does.
Though you should be careful with bison.
They are all very nice in
A pasture or stable,
But seat them at your dining room table,
And you will find out they bolt their food,
Their table talk is very rude,
And they do not ever use a commode,
They just sit and drop a buffaload.