GK: .....brought to you by the Ketchup Advisory Board.
TR: These are the good years for me and Barb. The kids are away, they're at a wilderness school in Utah where you learn self-reliance by subsisting on a diet of dandelions and rodents, and with the kids gone, Barb and I are starting to enjoy the English language again.
SS: With teenagers around, you start picking up their language and you go around saying, Wassup, and OMG and Awesome. Totally.
TR: And the word "not" ---- as in, "You are so cool. Not."
SS: You talk in monosyllables. Like ---- Hey! What? Huh? Ewwwww. But now with the kids away, our vocabulary has burgeoned, proliferated, snowballed.
TR: An unmitigated pleasure.
SS: No more remonstrations and rejoinders to remind our progeny of basic hygiene issues.
TR: Instead, we engage each other in reciprocal enlightenment, rejecting the metaphysics of motherhood and the positivism of paternity and the dogma of dog ownership and accepting the ambiguity of the ambulatory and the skepticism of ketchup.
SS: Ah yes. Ketchup. The unconditional condiment with natural mellowing agents.
RD: (sings)
These are the good times. The loons are on the lakes,
A mist on the water, as the morning breaks,
Life is flowing, like ketchup on cornflakes.
GK: Ketchup. For the good times.
RD: (sings) Ketchup...ketchup. Ketchup.