GK: It's spring in New York. It got up over sixty, the sun came out, and that means spring, no matter what happens afterward. So people are in good moods. Dogs are happy. Pigeons are happy, they've been living on dried gum for months. Runners are out in Central Park. And people handing out leaflets about the fate of the world and justice and equality, all the good stuff.

I used to think more about justice and the fate of the planet(FN W ECHO: FATE OF THE PLANET) and the future of democracy (FN W ECHO: THE FUTURE OF DEMOCRACY) and now my focus more and more is on every day efficiency and moving swiftly to accomplish small tasks without bumbling around like a doddering idiot ---- (FN W ECHO: NOT A DODDERING IDIOT) ---- for example, after breakfast, in one smooth uninterrupted motion, I want to put on my jacket (THWOP), pick up my billfold (SQUORT) and my cellphone (DING) and my glasses (CLICK) and kiss my wife (SMOOCH) and take one last swig of coffee (GULP) and take my car keys off the hook (DING) and put my laptop into the briefcase (THWOP) and go out the door (SWOP), get in the car (THUMP), start it (REV), and drive away (SFX) ---- which starts off the day in a spirit of competence and hope....

GK: ...This is how they do it in the movies. James Bond didn't bumble around. (TR SEAN: My .358 --- where did I put that? And the secret red button that activates the ejection rocket in the seat of my pants. Is this it? (ROCKET WHOOSH, TR CRY OF ALARM). The Leader of the Free World does not bumble in the morning. (TR OBAMA: Michelle!!!??? Where's my cellphone?) John Wayne didn't have to search all over the ranch house for his gunbelt. (TR WAYNE: Goldarn it, it was right here on the table when I turned in last night. And my neckerchief. Or did I leave em in the bunkhouse?) Heroes do not bumble. They proceed swiftly to accomplish small necessary tasks smoothly and efficiently. And that is my goal. This show is not about truth and beauty. It used to be. We used to have humpback whales singing Beethoven (ODE TO JOY, WHALE), we had very talented dolphins singing Joni Mitchell (BOTH SIDES NOW, DOLPHIN), and we celebrated Henry David Thoreau's birthday by sending a copy of Walden out into space (GIANT ROCKET BLAST), but that was then. Now this show is about competence. It's about moving smoothly from one task to another. Here is.....and then......and then Fred Newman is going to do a giant rat coming out of a toilet.