ELCA
.....brought to you by the ELCA, the Evelyn Lundberg Counselling Agency.
SS: This is Evelyn Lundberg. Listen. A lot of you went to college trying to be sophisticated and so you smoked like a house afire and got drunk as a skunk and avoided any sort of physical work and went around insulting your parents and you read depressing literature and went to depressing movies, and now look at you. You're old and in bad shape and, guess what--- you're depressed. And finally you realize that what you thought was smart was dumber than dirt.
Your parents could have told you that years ago and probably they did. Well, it's never too late to learn. Shape up. Get your work done. The way to get it done is to do it. You hear me? Lighten up. Smile. Be pleasant with people. Keep this in mind. It could be worse. Someday it will be. Be glad it isn't yet. And hang onto your old friends, including the one you're married to. There will come a time when there is no good reason to like you except out of longstanding habit. That day is coming sooner than you think.
GK: Evelyn Lundberg of the ELCA. If your parents have passed on and you want to know what they'd think, call Evelyn Lundberg.