Farewell, Minnesota, goodbye to St. Paul,

And my friends down at Mickey's, goodbye to you all.

I'm in New York City with a script of a play,

Called "Radio Man" and it's bound for Broadway.

It's the story of a man with a radio show

And the writing is fine though the action is slow.

It needs more conflict and darkness and fear

And I'm sure I'll be able to find those out here.

I have a phone number of a fellow in Queens

Who knows the brother of the woman who cleans

Alec Baldwin's apartment and he has a hunch

It won't be that hard to set up a lunch.

My play will be funny, satiric in mood,

Midwestern in outlook but with attitude.

There'll be rough language, though nothing too crude,

And ever so often someone will be nude.

It will be funny, right from the start

And yet very honest and touch the heart.

And it's all about struggle and how we will make it

And ever so often someone will be naked.

When it premieres, a big hit, and I get

My 2 and a half percent of the net,

I'll go back to the prairie and just be myself,

Modest and friendly, despite all my wealth.

I won't put on airs like a big Broadway star

I'll wear old clothes and drive my own car

I'll do my own cleaning and my own cooking

But I may go to New York when you're not looking