GK: We are here at Wolf Trap outside of Washington, D.C. and up there on the hill are hundreds of wolves who've come to the show. We asked one of them to come down on stage ----- how are you, sir?
FN (WOLF): Good to be here and welcome to (SNORTS, BARK).
GK: And that means-----
FN (WOLF): The place where you are now.
GK: So you don't use the name Wolf Trap.
FN (WOLF): We prefer the name (SNORTS, BARK).
GK: Which means what?
FN (WOLF): It means "the place where people pay money to watch other people"-----
GK: Okay.
FN (WOLF): And they do not know that we wolves are watching the watchers.
GK: I see them up there on the hill. A lot of yellow eyes up there gleaming in the dark. So for you wolves, this is more like a People Trap.
FN (WOLF): Yes, indeed. It's BYOB.
GK: Do you wolves come here to feed?
FN (WOLF): Maybe, maybe not. But if we saw a big meaty fellow like yourself all alone out on stage, no protection, under a spotlight-- it'd be hard to resist.
GK: I see. So when you say (SNORTS, BARK) you mean that-----
FN (WOLF): That's not what I said. I said, (SNORTS, BARK). What you said (SNORTS, BARK) means, "I dare you to sniff my behind, you do and I'll bite your neck."
GK: Oh, well that's not what I meant.
FN (WOLF): I'd be careful about clearing your throat, if I were you.
GK: I will.
FN (WOLF): You've got about 900 carnivorous wolves up there on the hill and they could be on you like flies on a cupcake.
GK: I'll be careful. So who are all those wolves up there?
FN (WOLF): They're members of my pack.
GK: I thought a pack would be only a few wolves.
FN (WOLF): They're my Super PAC.
GK: I see. So you're running for office.
FN (WOLF): Yes. But not as a wolf.
GK: No?
FN (WOLF): I got this disguise. Look. (WOLF,BAAING) What do you think?
GK: Your ears are sticking up. You need a bigger sheepskin.
FN (WOLF): It's sheep's clothing. It zips up. Can you help me?
GK: Sure. (LONG ZIP) There.
FN (WOLF): Ahhh. So? How do I look?
GK: It's a little small. And your tail is sticking out.
FN (WOLF): Whoops. Let me tuck that in (SFX) There. Now how do I look? Baaaa. Baaaa. Huh? Good?
GK: I don't think you're going to fool a lot of sheep. They can smell wolf, you know.
FN (WOLF): Baaaa. See ya.