GK: Our sound effects man, or sound resource person, as we like to think of him, Mr. Tom Keith. Sound effects people tend to live alone because they get on people's nerves, as you know if you ever had a brother (DRIPPING) who lay in the bunkbed above you and worked on his sound effects late at night, and wouldn't quit even when you hit him (KONK, THEN DRIP). Or the kid who sat behind you in school and made sounds (FAINT DEATH CHOKING) during physics tests especially when you reached down for a pencil (RASPBERRY). Sound effects is a child's art, it starts when you get your first set of plastic soldiers (SEQUENCE OF WAR SOUNDS) and line them up in the sandbox behind barricades and they bang away at each other for a while and the guys who aren't that good at sound effects, like me, we lost the war and became authors, and the guys who were good at it (MORTAR) (DIVE BOMB) (DULL EXPLOSIONS) they won the sandbox wars and they went into radio. And they had to go live by themselves, because nobody could live with someone who's always doing this (CHICKEN). Anyway, Tom has a country retreat in Wisconsin on Madeline Island (FOGHORN) and he lives there alone with his elk Earl (SFX) and he got rather ill from a rare cheese-borne virus and they had to run a brain scan on him (BLIPS ON SCREEN) and they kept him overnight for observation in a nice quiet room with an IV in his arm. (DRIPPING) All night. And then today he came to do the show.