I love my two electric heating pads
At a hundred eighty degrees Fahrenheit
I lay them in my bed, one at the foot and one at the head
If it weren't for heating pads I would be dead.

I love the seat warmer in my car
I love the butt warmer in my car
In a world of ice and snow it warms you from below
If it wasn't for butt warmers I'd stay home

I love the dog who curls up at my feet
The old dog who curls up at my feet
He smells and he sheds hair but he warms the bed down there
I love the dog who curls up at my feet.

There's nothing like a hot bath to get in
And sit in steaming water to your chin
Run more hot if it gets cold, hear it gurgle in the overflow
Sit in a bath and wash away your sins.

I love to put my pajamas in the dryer
Let them tumble round with the heat up higher
The flannel fits my form and keeps me toasty warm
Especially with an electric heating pad.

Did I mention my electric heating pad?
It's the best heating pad I ever had.
Turn the temperature up high and it feels just like July
And I lie in bed with a dog at my feet. (WOOF WOOF)
And pajamas that are warm from the dryer.
Amen.