Erica Rhodes: Dear Diary: I am at Tanglewood, in student orchestra, and I am in love. His name is Keith. He sits right behind me in the second violins, and he is gentle and sensitive and has music in his soul. So I've been wearing tube tops to rehearsal. Yesterday when we were rehearsing the Stravinsky, I dropped my pencil and reached for it just as he did and our fingers touched. For about a second and a half longer than you'd expect. Something is going on here. I feel so alive.


ER: The conductor kept looking at me today and it made me nervous and I came in four bars early once, and then after rehearsal this girl Brenda came up and told me was that my playing was narcissistic and juvenile. She is in the bass section, so she doesn't shave her legs. She is Keith's girlfriend. She hates me because Keith and I went for coffee yesterday and made out in his car.


ER: Keith and I are now stand partners. He was moved up and Brenda is out of her mind. She is telling people in the wind section that I steal things out of people's instrument cases backstage. Keith told me that Brenda is addicted to eating ice out of the ice machine. She gets a bucket of ice every night and lies in bed crunching. After rehearsal, we sat in his car for an hour and talked. He is a wonderful kisser.


ER: Keith texted me today. He said, "Meet me behind the music shed. Ten minutes." And a little heart icon. So I went. We kissed a lot and then we went to my room and that was where Brenda found us. She had a fire extinguisher. When we wouldn't open the door, she sprayed all this foam under the door and we had to go out the window in our underwear.


ER: Brenda wrote Keith this letter where she said that her love for him like the clouds which somehow stay up in the sky and nobody knows why. I saw her before rehearsal today, and I pointed out that clouds are just water vapor, and she started crying. Keith wants to meet me late tonight on the stage of the music shed. He wants to get wild.


ER: I am ecstatic. Keith is a total wildcat and I didn't get to bed until 3 a.m. and somehow I got confused and left my journal in the grass next to the blanket and somebody found it and passed it around and when I got to rehearsal everyone was staring at me and the conductor was in shock and Brenda was freaking out, but I don't care. I just sat down next to Keith like nothing was happening and we played the Stravinsky and it was the best we ever played it. Go figure.

ER: Tonight was the big performance. I was so excited. And then Keith sat down next to me and told me it's over and he loves Brenda because she is more his type. I said what type is that-crazy? My brain was gone so I played the Stravinsky completely on instinct which I guess was good because we got this massive standing ovation but I totally don't even care anymore. It means nothing. Every time I reached to turn the page, I turned two pages instead of one, and it drove Keith out of his mind. Good.


ER: I'm back in Boston, and I just got a letter from Keith. Brenda went to the doctor and they discovered she has an undescended testicle way up in her lungs and that's why she is the way she is. He wants to talk about it. I wrote back-NMP-Not My Problem. Anyway I learned my lesson: Don't go out with musicians. I'm dating an actor now. I really like him a lot. He is so outgoing. Next week he'll move in with me for a few months while he auditions for things. I really think this is going to work out. I have a good feeling about it.