Buffalo, Buffalo
The name suggests grandeur and class
It's not just a word that refers to a herd
Of animals munching on grass.
Buffalo, Buffalo
Does not mean to cheat or lie
It's a home to the weary here on Lake Erie
And it's perfect from June to July. (TO JULY)
Winter begins in October
And sometimes around Labor Day
And you're flat on your keester until after Easter
Or maybe the middle of May.
But Buffalo, Buffalo
In rain or in sleet or in snow
You may try to flee but eventually
We all wind up in Buffalo. (BUFFALO)
For Halloween kids dress up as ghosts because you can
wear a parka under your sheet.
You may have to put on skis just to get across the street.
Driver's Ed begins with getting a car out of deep snow,
You don't gun it, you rock it.
And you always carry a windshield scraper in your pocket.
A guy learns to walk in a crouch arms extended
Just in case he slips.
In marching band nobody wants to play trumpet
For fear it will freeze to your lips. (TO YOUR LIPS)
Buffalo, Buffalo
A neighborly town with a smile
Any age, either sex, wears wool turtlenecks
And red flannel shirts never go out of style.
Buffalo, Buffalo
Where life is simpler and slower
But when you expire your children will hire
Lawyers to get your snow blower (SNOW BLOWER)
When people are wearing ski masks and moon boots
And caps with earflaps like Russian recruits
And big snorkel jackets with a ring of fur
It's hard to tell him fro her. (HIM FROM HER)
You need kitty litter, lots, in your trunk
And a de-icer or else you are sunk.
An extra blanket to keep yourself warm
And a bottle to pee in if you're caught in a storm. (IN A STORM)
Buffalo, Buffalo
I know it sounds a bit bizarre
But in Buffalo Buffalo
That's how conditions are.
The rain may never fall on three-day weekends
By April 1st, the snow must disappear
I tell you, I don't know
A better place to go
For happy-ever-aftering than here
In Buffalo.