(GK: Garrison Keillor; TK: Tom Keith; SS: Sue Scott: TR: Tim Russell)

GK: A happy Midsummer's Day to you, Mr. President.

TR (BUSH): Thank you very much. Good to be here.

GK: What brings you to Seattle, Mr. President?

TR (BUSH): A plane, I think. Heh heh heh. Heh heh heh. Heh heh. Actually, came here to plant some salmon and dedicate a tree hatchery and pick up a fake I.D. for my daughter.

GK: How was your trip to Europe?

TR (BUSH): Great. Met all the leaders. Got along real well. Like the Russian guy ---- I called him Pooty and the English guy, Tony-O. Give em all nicknames. And the French guy, I called him the Chuckster. Nice guy. Very friendly

GK: I don't think his name is Chuck, though. It's Jacques Chirac.

TR (BUSH): I just called him the Chuckster. He sorta liked it.

GK: How were your talks with Mr. Putin?

TR (BUSH): Pooty? We got along great. No problems.

GK: No problems?

TR (BUSH): Consultation. That's what it's all about. We go over there and tell em what we're going to do and they listen and we come home and we do it. That's how it works.
GK: Sounds like a successful trip.

TR (BUSH): Got to see places I'd never seen before. France, Germany, England, places of that sort. Hotels were good. Had CNN right in the room so you could keep up on things. And they all speak English over there. Never had a language problem. You ever go to Europe?

GK: Yeah.

TR (BUSH): Really. I guess people do, don't they.

GK: Yeah, a lot of people do.

TR (BUSH): Quite a time change over there.

GK: About five or six hours.

TR (BUSH): I don't understand how people can live with that sort of thing. I mean it's okay for a few days but to live your whole life like that----

GK: I suppose people get used to it.

TR (BUSH): I suppose. And I suppose people can tape their shows and listen to em later.

GK: Right. Thank you, Mr. President.

© Garrison Keillor 2001