(GK: Garrison Keillor, AP: Alice Playten)
......brought to you by Julie Green's Used Psychotherapy. ------
AP: Hi, this is Julie Green. Do you feel you may be paying too much for psychotherapy? You sit for 50 minutes every Tuesday in the room with the brown leather chairs and you try to keep your therapist entertained by telling him stories, and at the end of the 50 minutes, the therapist lights his pipe and says something like, "Maybe you need to give yourself permission to accept your success." And you go to the elevator, thinking, "I paid $150 for a guy with a goatee to tell me to allow myself to be happy????" Well, at Julie Green's Used Psychotherapy, you pay $15. Why? Because I give the same advice I gave everybody else. I tell you to make time for yourself. To make a space where you feel completely safe. To learn to ask for what you want. To be more positive and less perfect. I say, How long have you felt this way? Are you really committed to changing? Can you say some more about that? I'll tell you to take a deep cleansing breath. All for $15 an hour.
GK: Julie Green's Used Psychotherapy. Why pay new therapy prices to hear stuff you can hear just as well used?
AP: We've raised some important issues here but we have to stop for today. When you come back next week, I want you to bring a list of three things that made you happy during the week and three things that made you angry. Okay?
GK: If it makes you angry to pay too much for therapy, why not try Julie Green's Used Psychotherapy.
AP: Are you choosing to be hurt? Can you make another choice?
GK: Why not choose Julie Green's Used Psychotherapy? You'll be glad you did.
(c) 2000 by Garrison Keillor