(GK: Garrison Keillor, SS: Sue Scott, TK: Tom Keith, TR: Tim Russell)
There was a young fellow of Reno
Who lost his shirt in the casino,
And the kitchen sink
And most of his drink
Except for the maraschino.
The children who live in Las Vegas
Like spinach and raw rutabagas.
"We love them," said one,
"If it's only for fun,
But we wouldn't if you tried to make us."
There was an old lady of Reno
Who stayed up all night playing keno
On the strength of some pills
And the sight of large bills
And a handsome young dealer named Gino.
A young architect of Nevada
Did a fountain in pink terra-cotta
That, six times a day,
Did the fall of Pompeii
And the sinking of the Spanish armada.
There was an old man of Nevada
Who dated a girl and he had a
Nice time with Nancy
Till she tickled his fancy
And he lost control of his bladder.
A lady from Reno, Nevada,
Said, "Reno is surely no Sodo-
M and Gomorrah,
It's rather adora-
Ble, if you like lights, and you gotta.
There was a young man of Nevada
Who played tunes on a jug or a pot, a
Musician whose repertoir
Went from Sgt. Pepper t' Our
Gang to the Moonlight Sonata.
There was an old crooner named Geoff
Who gradually became deaf
Til he couldn't distinguish
Italian from English
Or the treble from the bass clef.
(c) 1999 by Garrison Keillor