DD: It used to be so energizing and now it's gotten so tired....so repetitive. I just don't get the sense of excitement anymore. I used to go, like, yes, and now I'm going like, huh?

TR: If you're dissatisfied with your present yoghurt...time to try Fayleen Farms yoghurt ---- the all-natural yoghurt from cats. (MEOW)

DD: What's the advantage of cat yoghurt over other types of yoghurt, Doctor?

TR: Different kinds of yoghurt, Judy, carry different cultures that can impact a person in different ways.

DD: I see.....

TR: Ordinary yoghurt (MOO) can make a person feel sluggish, docile, logy, so you only feel like lying on your side and chewing, and goat yoghurt (GOAT) can make a person hungry for cardboard, plastic containers, shoes, but cat yoghurt enables a person to focus (HUNTERLY MEOW) on one thing --- and it'll give you strong urges to tidy up after yourself (SCRATCHING IN CAT BOX) ---

DD: That makes sense. But will cat yoghurt also make me want to lick myself?

TR: Saliva is nature's own emollient, Judy. Try it and see if your skin isn't younger looking.

DD: How do they get yoghurt from cats, Doctor?

TR: You'd never want to know. (MEOW) Leave that to us. Fayleen Farms. For people who dare to go out and take what they want. (MUSIC OUT)

©1997 By Garrison Keillor