GK:....brought to you by the Ketchup Advisory Board. (BRIGHT CHIRPY MUSIC)
CF: Bob! Look! You've raked the leaves, cleaned out the garage, split two cords of firewood, and made this delicious bouillabaisse --- and it's not even noon yet.
TR: What's so unusual about that, Peg?
CF: You used to have the energy of a garden slug, Bob. Now you're doing things around the house and coaching two pee-wee soccer teams and doing your weekly show on public access while doing your job and rising rapidly through the ranks of middle management. How do you do it?
TR: No problem, Peg! Now I've got The Patch.
CF: The Patch?
TR: The Ketchup Patch! I put it under my left arm --- see? and I can feel that rich tomatoey goodness all day long.
CF: Ketchup in patch form! What'll they think of next?
GK: A message from the Ketchup Advisory Board, which reminds you:
CF: Fill it up...with Ketchup!!!
©1996 BY GARRISON KEILLOR AND RICH PROCTER