SS: Hi, Marlene Brauer here for Duct Tape. Yah, it's been quite a winter and now that the permafrost has melted we can see all the cracks and the damage it did. Went out on the patio and a whole bunch of bricks were loose because the concrete turned to powder. Yah, if I'd mixed a little egg into it, I coulda used it to batter crappies.

Well, Duane's not much of a handyman. The last thing he fixed successfuly was the cat. So I called the contractor and when he gave me an estimate, I said not on your life. So I picked up some Duct Tape in the new family size jumbo pack of 150 rolls? Covered that patio area and had enough left over to do half the driveway. And let me tell you, that shiny silver duct tape sure helps with the sun tan. Your winter complexion is gone faster than you can say melanoma. Well, sure good talking to you. You take care then. Bye now.

© 1996 Garrison Keillor