GK:. . .after this message from Minnesota, the state of contentment.

SS: I graduated from a fancy eastern college after four miserable years with ten thousand dollars in debts, a lot of personal pain, and a major in English that qualified me for absolutely nothing, zip, zero, so--- what did I do? I moved to New York City and got a job in a horror show working for a psycho boss and I rented myself a small dark cell with cockroaches for roommates for $1200 a month, my entire salary, and I endured the squalor and meanness of the city and proceeded to date a series of angry wounded men who claimed that they just hadn't met the right woman yet and I was grateful to not be her. And then one day I said to myself, "Kimberley?" "Yes," I replied. "Kimberley," I said to myself, "why don't you move to Minnesota, where you could be truly happy and fulfilled?" "Kimberley," I said to myself, "That sounds like a good idea." So I did. Minnesota. Rent is reasonable, bosses are too, and the single men are well brought up and the climate prepares them to be passionately romantic. And best of all, with the sale of Lake Superior to Los Angeles Water Commission, every Minnesota gets a huge cash bonus every year just for being here.

GK: Don't you think it's time you tried Minnesota?

© 1996 by Garrison Keillor