GK: .....after this message from the Ketchup Advisory Board.

TR: My best friend, Bobby, saved my life three years ago when I was choking to death in a steakhouse and he performed the Heimlich maneuver. So it was painful when I had to lay him off last week.

FN: Thirty one years and I get thrown under the bus . By you, ya jerk.

TR: Sorry, pal.

FN: That time you fell to the floor with a chunk of sirloin in your gullet, I should've walked away and let you die.

TR: You know, it's hard for me, too.

FN: You were gasping and writhing on the floor and if I'd known this was coming, I would've put my knee on your wind pipe.

TR: I know you're going through a hard time right now.

FN: What's this?

TR: A gift for you. Open it.

FN: Jeeze. (UNWRAPPING) Why it's----- (HE CHOKES UP) ---- it's a bottle of ketchup. In an heirloom cut-glass decanter. I don't know what to say.

TR: No need to say anything, old friend. Enjoy.

GK: Ketchup.....what better way to show you care.


When you need to help a friend

Who is feeling low.

Tell them that you love them, they are numero uno.

The gift of ketchup says: I'm here for you, you know.

Ketchup, ketchup, ketchup.