GK: .....It's June, the month of weddings, and here's a message from Deep Valley Bed Systems. (ORGAN: WAGNER MARCH FR PARSIFAL)

Why am I here?
Who is this man
In a tuxedo and holding my hand?

He's the wrong guy
He's not the one
Pick up your dress, turn around, girl, and run

Why does she cry?
I wish she'd stop.
I'm not bad looking and I have a job.

I'm not on drugs,
Sober, I swear.
Height weight proportionate and have my own hair.

TR: Sometimes two people meet at the altar and look at each other in surprise. They fell in love in the dark and now, in the light of day, they see more than they want to know about each other. But it's too late to turn back. They're holding the unity candle, their mothers are weeping. the bridesmaids are waiting for the bouquet, and now here come the rings.

Guess it's too late, the song's almost done
Could have done better but he is the one.

We'll do our best to keep the same address
Thank goodness we bought a very nice mattress.

TR: Yes, the Deep Valley Bed is the only mattress that comes with a pre-shaped valley running down the middle, adjustable to your incline preference--steep, shallow, or gorge ----so that even if the two of you try to cling to the edge, sleep loosens your grip, and the force of gravity brings you together.

It's not so bad
It could be worse
It's better than coming to church in a hearse.

We said the words
Now we are wed
We'll give it a shot in our Deep Valley bed.

GK: A message from Deep Valley Bed Systems.