GK: It's spring, it's the season of love, and you meet a guy online---- (SS: "Damaged but willing to try again." Well, okay---- why not?) and he's nice. Sort of serious about wine, but okay.
TR (IRA-ESQUE): Taste that malty oak flavor. Very muscular, but with subversive notes of maple syrup, French lentils, and okra. What do you think. Linda?
SS: It's good. I like it.
GK: And then things come to a serious point.
SS: Would you like to come over?
TR: To your place?
SS: To my place.
TR: Where is your place?
SS: I'm on Staten Island. About 15 minutes from the ferry.
SS: Where do you live?
TR: Far Rockaway.
TR: I mean, I could do it. We'd take the ferry and walk to your place.
TR: And then I'd take the ferry back to Manhattan. Walk over and catch the No. 4 and take that to Fulton Street.
SS: You can catch the A train at Fulton.
TR: Right. Take that to Far Rockaway. That's about an hour.
SS: Or you could take the bus across the Verrazano.
TR: That'd be longer.
SS: What are you doing?
TR: Googling it.
SS: How long does it take?
TR: Two hours nineteen minutes.
TR: Long way.
TR: I like you a lot, Linda.
SS: I like you.
TR: But, two hours and nineteen minutes each way is too long. I'm sorry.
SS: You're right. (SAD CHORDS)
GK: No need to give up on romance just because public transportation is complicated. Now the MTA is offering a Singles Car on all rush-hour trains. Generally the last car on the train, and when you get aboard you may find your true love right there. (FN: WATCH FOR THE CLOSING DOORS, PLEASE. BING BONG, DOORS CLOSE, TRAIN RUMBLES)
SS: Hi. Mind if I sit down?
TR: No. Go right ahead. (HEART POUNDING) (REVERB) Wow. What a looker.
SS: (REVERB) My dreamboat. Right here on the F train. (PIANO GLISS AND WALTZ)
SS: And that's how I met Jerry. We both work in Midtown. He lives in Queens at 179th Street, I'm at 169th, one stop away. Riding back and forth twice a day, we gradually got to know each other's likes and dislikes. I read the paper over his shoulder. After six months, he put his arm around me. A year later, I invited him to my apartment for supper. We took it slow because that's how the F train is. We were engaged for six years and then we got married. We moved into his apartment which is next door to his parents'. It's nice.
GK: Romance on the subway. Last car on the train. Why not give it a chance? (BING BONG)