TR: These are the good years for Barb and me. I had my prostate checked and everything looked good. Turns out the problem was that my underwear got bunched up. So it was good to get that straightened out. And our daughter came home from rehab. She's been in a number of rehabs and now she's in one for people with eating disorders. Wendy only eats cereal. So they put her on a new diet and she's got a little ankle bracelet that goes off if it detects cereal in her bloodstream. She's staying with us for a few weeks until she goes back to her life. Whatever that is.


SS: I can't tell you how much it means to your dad and me to have you back under our roof, honey. We missed you terribly these past five years you've been in rehab and it means a lot that you want to be with us again.

ER: Yeah, well. Get over it. It wasn't my choice. It's part of the therapy. Just so you know.

SS: We've been all giddy and talking about this for weeks, haven't we, Jim?

TR: Yeah. ---- How's those Brussels sprouts?

ER: I mean, what therapy taught me is that you were not the parents I needed to become who I really and truly am.
SS: Well ---- so it's been worth it then ---- these past five years of therapy-----

ER: To me, you're just two people whose house I used to stay in.

SS: Well, that's something----- anyway----

ER: I wanted a dog and you only let me have a fish. I had to take the bus to school which was humiliating. You told me I had thick knees and that's why I had to wear Kevin's hand-me-downs and then you said to me once that you hoped I'd meet a boy who liked me and that's when I ran away from home, and when I came back, you didn't even notice I'd been gone.

TR: You ran away from home?

SS: I noticed.

ER: I was gone a day and a half and you thought I'd just gone upstairs.

SS: Well, you always were sort of stand-offish----

ER: Stand offish???? People suffer from emotional deficit syndrome and you call it stand-offish????

SS: So are you dating someone?

ER: Mom. I just got out of rehab. I'm probably going to go to another rehab.

SS: Aren't there any nice boys at rehab?

ER: Boys who are in rehab tend not to be terrific dating prospects.

SS: I just thought, you know, maybe you might meet someone you had something in common with. Somebody who's troubled. Like an artist.

ER: Just stop, mom.

TR: Barb.

ER: The reason I have this cereal dependency is that you couldn't cook.

SS: Oh my.

ER: Your meals were a horror show. And then Dad brought home all these cereal 12-packs. Dad was the enabler.

TR: Well, I like to have the choice, you know.

ER: And now I have an ankle bracelet on and do you have any idea what that's like? Do you? To have this craving for Raisin Bran? To think about Grape Nuts all day?

TR: I just wonder if maybe you're not getting enough ketchup.

ER: Ketchup? What are you talking about?

TR: Ketchup contains natural mellowing agents that help you take the good with the bad. Or, take the good, and ignore the bad. So you can get on with things. And be productive. Together. For the good of everyone.

ER: I don't think you understand at all.


These are the good times
Though we have made mistakes
Dark clouds are gone now
A brighter day awakes
Life is flowing
Like ketchup on corn flakes.

GK: Ketchup, for the good times.

RD: Ketchup, ketchup