Garrison Keillor:
Minnesota my Minnesota
the place where I was born.
Rolling meadows, fields of soybeans,
And tomatoes and sweet corn.

AUD: chorus

Sue Scott: Hi. Can you tell me how I can get to the--(GASP) Oh my gosh.

GK: Get to the what? (CHICKEN)

SS: What a beautiful chicken. Is that yours?

GK: Yep.

SS: Wow. What's his name?

GK: Trevor.

SS: He's beautiful.

GK: Thank you.

SS: I never saw a chicken up close before. How do you get him to look like that? He's so clean-(CHICKEN)

GK: He's a well-bred chicken.

SS: So where are you from?

GK: Me? Willmar.

SS: Where's that?

GK: Sort of west of here.

SS: Oh! I'm from Minneapolis.

GK: Really. I've always been curious about Minneapolis. They say there's a covered stadium there.

SS: You've never been to Minneapolis?

GK: No.

SS: You've never been to a big city?

GK: I've been to St. Cloud.

SS: Where's that?

GK: North of here.

SS: Oh, right.

GK: So you like Minneapolis?

SS: I guess, I mean I like New York--lot of places. But Minneapolis is good for now. So do you want to go out for pronto pups after this?

GK: Sure, ok.

SS: And then we can go on Ye Olde Mill.

GK: Isn't that the Tunnel of Love ride?

SS: Is it? Oh-- (CHICKEN)

GK: Let's go.

SS: Really?

GK: Let's do it. I haven't been out of this barn for four days. (ANGRY CLUCKING) Right after the judging.

SS: Of course.

GK: You'll wait for me?

SS: Of course!

I wish he'd tell me
That he loves me
And that he'd hold me in his arms
And that he'd move to
I don't care to live on a farm.


SS: Gosh. It's dark in here. I can't see a thing.

GK: I'm right here.

SS: (CLUCKING) Is your chicken ok?

GK: I've got him. He's just a little confused.

SS: I suppose he's excited about winning the purple ribbon.

GK: He's a Lutheran chicken so he doesn't get too puffed up over it.

SS: Right--do you like the tunnel of love... ?

GK: Sure. Why do they call it that?

SS: Well. It's dark in here--Oh! Is that your hand?

GK: Yeah. What's that?

SS: It's my collarbone.

GK: Oh. It's beautiful. Do you mind if I just--run my index finger along it ?

SS: No, that's (SIGHS) -that's nice (CHICKEN WARNING) Is he ok?

GK: He's fine. He's great. If there were a collarbone contest, you'd be the winner, I'll tell you that. Hands down.
SS: You know I don't even know your name.

GK: It's Craig.

SS: I'm Ashley.

GK: I feel like I've known you for a long time.

SS: Oh my gosh, I was just about to say that.

GK: I want to kiss you.

SS: I was just about to say that, too.

GK: If I can find your face--

SS: I'm right here-- (KISSING, SLOW CLUCKING)Wow. That was amazing.

GK: Yes it was.

SS: I want you to see Minneapolis. I want to show you things-I want to make you soy non-fat lattes in the morning and do yoga together on mats made of natural fibers-

GK: And I want you to see Willmar.

SS: Do they have yoga in Willmar?

GK: I don't know.

SS: Do you like raw fish?

GK: Sure.

Garden salads and sashimi,
With a glass of cold white wine.
I could teach him to dance salsa,
And dress him in Calvin Klein.

GK: This has been amazing, meeting you.

SS: Do you have to go?

GK: I have to ask you one thing, Ashley.

SS: What?--

GK: You're Lutheran, aren't you? I mean, I guess I just sort of assumed. I mean, it's okay if you're not. None of my business. I just wanted to -- you know--

SS: No. I'm not.

GK: Oh.

SS: Is that a problem?

GK: No. -- You're Christian, aren't you?

SS: In a general sense. Yes. I mean, I think there's a great deal there. I think that the -- well-- the-- I think the Golden Rule, for example-- you know-- I try to -- you know-- do that. Do unto others. What's wrong?

GK: You're a Democrat, aren't you.

SS: I am.

GK: I never sat this close to a Democrat before.

SS: Now you have. (CLUCKING)

GK: Gotta go.

SS: Kiss me again.

GK: Now?

SS: Don't think about it. Just kiss me.

GK: People are looking.

SS: So?

GK: There might be somebody I know.

SS: So what?

GK: You want me to kiss you?

SS: Kiss me.

I knew that I shouldn't do it
But I kissed her then and there
And that is what I'll remember
About the Minnesota State Fair.
You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You'll never know, dear,
How much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away.