Garrison Keillor: Our show is brought to you by the Cafe Boeuf Nashville with your host, Armand the maitre'd.
GK: Bonjour, Armand.
Tim Russell: What did you say?
TR: Something about insurance?
GK: It was nothing. What are your specials tonight, Armand?
TR: Tonight we have the (FRENCH GIBBERISH) and we have the (GIBBERISH) and finally we have the (GIBBERISH) (FRENCH DELIGHT, LIP SMACKING, CHUCKLES).
GK: I'd like the (HE REPEATS ONE).
TR: You want me to pick you up at the bus station?
GK: No, no...
TR: You and my wife?
GK: No, no...
TR: What are you doing in the bus station with my wife, monsieur?
GK: I didn't say that, I said, (HE TRIES AGAIN)...
TR: My brother has eaten his shoe and he has an onion up his nose?
GK: I'm sorry, my accent is poor.
TR: And my dog passes gas?
GK: What was the second special you mentioned?
TR: (HE REPEATS THE SECOND)...
GK: What is it? Does it involve the internal organs of large animals?
TR: Oui, monsieur.
GK: Then I don't want to know. Put extra sauce on it, okay?
TR: Tres bien.
GK: And French fries.
TR: Monsieur, all of the potatoes are French potatoes.
TR: Whether we fry them or boil them or mash them, they are French. You do not need to say French fries. Of course they are French.
GK: I'm sure. There's a French saying that I think of on New Year's Eve --(TR FRENCH) -- no, that's not the right saying -- (TR FRENCH QUESTION) no, it's about change-- (TR LONG FRENCH DECLAMATION) -- no, it's the one that says, "The more things change, the more they stay the same" -- (TR FRENCH: "Plus c'est la meme chose, plus ca change") right.
(TR FRENCH): It doesn't mean "The more things change, the more they stay the same"? (TR FRENCH NIGGLING)
GK: "The more things remain, the more they change"? (TR FRENCH FRUSTRATION--"SO HARD TO TRANSLATE") "Different things are pretty much alike"? (TR FRENCH NON NON NON NON) "We're not as different as we used to be when we were similar"?
Anyway-- A message from the Cafe Boeuf. Even here on the frozen tundra, the spirit of La Belle France lives on at the Cafe Boeuf. (KNOWING FRENCH LAUGH)--