Garrison Keillor: You? go out for dinner at a very expensive restaurant, where the appetizers start at $8 and the entrees start at $31 and the entrees come (OHS) and yours is six half-ounce medallions of pork on a white plate two-and-a-half feet in diameter with swirls of green foam on it and a spoonful of caramelized rice and the waiter says:

Tom Keith: Fresh pepper anyone?

Sue Scott: Yes, of course. (GRINDER) Fresh pepper. These braised scallops in an effusion of parsnips look delicious.

TK: Fresh pepper, sir?

Tim Russell: Oh, yes, of course. These frog legs stuffed with snails -- they're exquisite. (GRINDER)

TK: And how about you, sir? Fresh pepper?

GK: Actually, I'd like a bottle of ketchup.


GK: Don?t be a slave to fashion. Here's your chance to stand apart from the crowd. Look up and smile and say...Give me some red!

TK: Very well, monsieur. (KETCHUP SPLURTS)

GK: Yes, nothing says rugged individualism and uncompromising integrity like asking for ketchup.

TR (RICH GUY): You know, son, my law firm has been looking for a new general partner...I think we've found one.

SS (TO HERSELF, DREAMILY): And I?'ve been looking for a life partner...

GK: Show 'em what you?re made of. Just say...

TR: Fill it up...with ketchup!

Rich Dworsky: Springtime is coming, folks are feeling sharp
Weddings are coming, get the fiddle and harp
Life is flowing like ketchup on your carp.