Garrison Keillor: ...brought to you by Fisher's Coffee...
Rob Fisher: I'm Rob Fisher, and I grew up in Norfolk, and sometimes when people from up North came here, they'd get drowsy, especially in the summer. We had to perk them up and that's how I developed Fisher's Coffee. If someone you love suffers from inattentiveness, try Fisher's. It comes from Norfolk.
Sue Scott: Al?...
Tim Russell: Hm?
SS: Al? Are you listening?
SS: This is me. I'm your wife.
SS: Janet. Remember? The wedding? I was the one in the white dress?
SS: The mother of your children? Remember them? The short people who call you "Daddy"?
SS: Al, we moved to Norfolk a year ago and we haven't gone anywhere or seen anything. Williamsburg. The Botanical Garden. The Azalea Festival has come and gone, Al. It was last weekend. I wanted to go and I couldn't get you moving.
SS: This is a .38 caliber revolver in my hand, Al--
TR: Janet-- what are you doing?
SS: You noticed me...
TR: Put the gun down, Janet.
SS: I will. As soon as you drink the coffee. Drink it. Now. (SLURPS) (MUSIC STARTS UNDER)
TR (PIRATE): Arrrgh matey.
SS: That's the man I fell in love with!!!
TR (PIRATE): I'll just grab me sword, woman, and throw you over me shoulder (SS SHRIEK) -- oh oh-- what's that octopus doing -- (OCTOPUS WALKING) Back! Back! (WHIPPING SWORD IN AIR, STABS OCTOPUS)
SS: My hero! You saved me!!!
TR (PIRATE): Arrgh, let's find us an ATM machine and get some gold doubloons and head out on the town and do some pillaging! (HE LAUGHS. FN PARROT: Let's do Norfolk, let's do Norfolk)
GK: Fisher's Coffee-- it's a wake-up call. (BIG BOAT HORN) From Norfolk. (GK SINGS FISHER'S THEME)