...brought to you by Fred Farrell Animal Calls. (MONKEY, JUNGLE BIRDS) When it comes to animal calls, there's just one name, and that's Fred Farrell.

TR: This is Fred Farrell with a message for all of you in management. Durango, Colorado, has a reputation as a mellow, hang-loose, go-with-the- flow, I'm-beautiful-you're-beautiful type of place but believe me, there wouldn't be much flow to go with if there weren't guys in management with deep growly voices who can scare the snot out of people. All these books about horizontal power-sharing and decentralized decision-making are nothing but a bunch of cheese doodles if you ask me ---- the secret of leadership is communication, and that doesn't mean sitting holding hands with incompetent idiots and reassuring them that you really like them when you don't. Communication means letting other people know who's boss, and that means learning the Five Pillars of Clear Communication: Snapping, Snorting, Snarling, Barking and Bellowing. It works in the animal world and it works in the business world too. Every executive needs to practice basic communication skills every day: how to snap....(TK: Hey!) to snort (TK: Huh!) to snarl (TK: I want that report on my desk today) to bark (TK: I mean it!)....and how to bellow (TK: OTHERWISE THERE'S GOING TO BE BIG TROUBLE AROUND HERE, DO YOU READ ME?). Here at the Fred Farrell School of Business, we give you tape cassettes of animal calls.....the snap (YIP), the snort (BUFFALO), the snarl (CAT HISS), the bark (DOG BARK), and the bellow (WALRUS) you can practice in your car on the way to work. Buy our tape and learn how to do it the right way. And go do it right now!

GK: The Fred Farrell School of Business communication course can be ordered by mail or from our website, fredfarrell-dot-sob ---- order today and get, absolutely free, our eight-in-one animal calls, including shorthorn (SFX), shark (SFX), shellfish (SFX), shovelbill (SFX), Shropshire sheep (SFX), golden shepherd (SFX), shrew (SFX), shrike (SFX), shriek owl (SFX), shrimp (SFX), and Shetland (SFX). Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to animal calls. (MONKEY, JUNGLE BIRDS)

(c) 1998 by Garrison Keillor